Most leaders believe their leadership style is their own. It is not.
It is assembled, piece by piece, from their parents, teachers, bosses, mentors and any leader who has ever made them feel something. Motivated, inspired, confused, or demotivated. Whether you know it or not, you are a Frankenstein leader. And understanding that is one of the most powerful things you can do for your own leadership development.
The spreadsheet I kept for 15 years
Early in my career, I made a deliberate decision to become a relentless student of leadership. One of the first things I did was create a spreadsheet in which I recorded the characteristics of every boss I worked for and every senior leader I observed closely. I noted their behaviours and traits that made a positive impact on me, and equally the ones that confused or demotivated me. I did this consistently over 15 years.
That practice became foundational to my growth as a leader. It is also why I now encourage every client I mentor to become a deliberate student of leadership with a system that forces them to observe, reflect and authentically copy the behaviours that create positive impact.
“Whether you know it or not, you are a Frankenstein leader. And understanding that is one of the most powerful things you can do for your own leadership development”
The leaders you decided not to become
I once worked for a boss, Bob. He was a ‘jiggler’, constantly bouncing his right foot when frustrated or angry. And he got angry a lot.
As CFO, I was responsible for supply chain. One day we received an enquiry from a regulatory body. I asked my head of supply chain to draft a response, read it, thought ‘this isn’t great’, but life was busy as my wife and I had just welcomed our third child home, so let it slide.
A few days later, on my one day of paternity leave, my phone rang at 8am. It was Bob. I could hear his foot bouncing.
He exploded. Yelling, swearing, calling me lazy. For 15 minutes he told me I’d never be a CEO if I showed this lack of accountability. By the end I was nearly in tears. As he calmed down, he said “I want you to remember this conversation”.
I replied: “Bob, I’ll tell my grandchildren about it, but without the swear words. Thank you.”
On Monday morning I walked into his office, closed the door and said: “Bob, you were right. I didn’t show accountability and the quality of that work was unacceptable. But if you ever speak to me like that again, I won’t come to work the next day.” And I walked out.
Bob was right about the standard, but wrong about the method. Both lessons helped me on my leadership journey.
Authentic copying: the lion dance
I recall watching a video clip of Richard Branson when he launched his first Virgin Galactic space flight, on which he was a passenger. In the clip, he rode a bicycle from his hotel to the launch site. It brilliantly connected one of the oldest and newest forms of transport and made the launch unforgettable. I observed that behaviour, absorbed the principle behind it, and asked myself whether I could authentically copy it.
The answer came at a company event in Singapore where I was hosting an audience of 600 people. I dressed up as a lion and performed a lion dance up the centre aisle with our Singapore country manager. When we reached the stage and removed our lion heads, the crowd erupted because they had no idea it was us. Eight years later, when I reconnect with people who were at that event, they still vividly remember that moment.
I did not copy Branson’s bicycle. I copied the principle of creating a truly memorable opening moment and translated it into something authentic to me and meaningful to my audience. That is the Frankenstein leader model working at its best.
“When a leader makes you feel motivated, empowered and clear on direction, ask yourself what specifically they did to create that feeling. When a leader leaves you confused or demotivated, ask the same”
Your leadership lifeline: a practical tool
An exercise I give new mentoring clients is to create a leadership lifeline. Their task is to draw a timeline from birth to today and identify the five people who have most shaped them as a leader. I have done this with hundreds of leaders over the years, and the most common answers are one or both parents.
For each person on your lifeline, ask yourself three questions:
- Why did this person affect you? What specifically did they do that left a mark, positive or negative?
- What characteristics did they exhibit? Be specific. Not ‘they were a good leader’ but ‘they always knew the root cause of a problem and could communicate it with simplicity’.
- How does this connect to your leadership today? Are you consciously or unconsciously copying any of these traits right now? Chances are, you are.
Start Monday
From this point forward, be deliberate in observing leadership around you in business, sport, community, family and politics. When a leader makes you feel motivated, empowered and clear on direction, ask yourself what specifically they did to create that feeling. When a leader leaves you confused or demotivated, ask the same question.
Your leadership style was never entirely your own but from Monday, it can be deliberately yours.
Dane Hudson is the author of Discipline Beats Vision. How to be the leader your company needs. Starting Monday. A global CEO for more than 25 years and mentor to more than 150 founder CEOs and C-suite leaders, his 1,000-page Impactful Leadership Framework is the foundation of both the book and his mentoring practice.
